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Click on the image above to read the private diary of  Dave Waymer: a fictious character based on the lives of people I have met.

WARNING
Mature Content!

JULY 17, 2008

Dear Diary,

Got up, showered, shaved, had breakfast, dressed and hopped on the Internet to find a job. Wow. No great news there.

I did hear a commercial about West. I called the number and I went down to take a computer test. I have an interview tomorrow afternoon. My sister tells me it's not a good company to work for. She says there is too much turn over. But my unemployment is about to run out and I need a job to help pay the bills. Jon Clark has been a good friend about pulling most of the load, but I need to help. He's not saying anything but I think he wishes I'd hurry up and get a job so he can have more money to do the things he likes. I owe that to him.

Tiger

July 18, 2008

Dear Diary,

Great news! I got the job! Finally after six months I feel like a human again! Yeah!! I start training on Monday. I can't wait. I don't need to tell you what this means to me. What's nice, I can walk to work from here. It will only take 15 minutes. No more bus, no more bumming rides. At least to get to work.

The lady who interviewed me was very nice and said I would do great at the job. I will take incoming calls for AT&T wireless customers. I like cell phones and my parents have AT&T so I think this will work great. Oh yeah, Jon Clark has AT&T too. Training is about 6 weeks long and I get a 500-dollar bonus after I complete training and work about 30 days. Something like that.

I told Jon Clark when he got home and he said we should go out and celebrate. He's paying. Why not? We're going Saturday night. I hope to get wasted. More than I did on my birthday.

Tiger

July 19, 2008

OK, now this was a weird day!

Jon Clark got some people together for my party. We decided we would go to a gay bar. Hey, beer is beer. So we all went to this gay bar downtown. Only two of us were straight. My friend Alex and me. We got a table upstairs and Jon Clark bought a picture of Bud and me a Long Island Tea.

When I finished the drink I started dancing. The guys laughed at me because I didn't know how to dance as good as the gay guys. Hey, I was buzzed. I didn't care. Besides, I'm not gay!

Jon Clark told me sometimes a man's penis will pop out during a dance. Not my idea of a good time. Luckily I didn't see that happen. Jon Clark's boyfriend gave me some money to buy another picture of Bud so I took the picture downstairs to the bar. I saw a man standing at the bar. He smiled at me and I smiled back. I said' "hi" and he came over, grabbed me and stuck his tongue down my throat and kissed me!! What the hell! What am I suppose to think of that? A man never kissed me before. Why don't girls do that? The gay guy left me alone and I took the picture back upstairs. I didn't tell anyone. I will take that experience to the grave!

Jon Clark's boyfriend was the DD and the three of us left the bar about 1:30 Sunday morning. When we walked out the bar some guys standing outside yelled at us. They called us fags and fruitcakes. They called Jon Clark a 'butt fucker'.

Jon Clark and his boyfriend kept walking and just ignored them. I guess they're use to it. It bothered me because I wanted to tell them I wasn't gay.

But you know, I saw a part of mankind I never saw before. My mom told me once life is a classroom and you are either learning what you teach, teaching what you learn, or sleeping. I guess I learn something about the meanness of people that I can teach others to deal with. Jon Clark and his boyfriend are good people and if those guys knew that maybe they wouldn't have been so evil, but then again maybe they would. It's all about ignorance.

I'm a black man in a white town and they treat me better than that. I'd rather have friends like Jon Clark on my side that people like those jerks. No matter what you do or say, people are going to hate you. I guess that's America.

Tiger

July 20, 2008

I almost didn't make it to church because of the late night. I just finished brushing my teeth when I heard my dad honking his horn. I skipped breakfast. Slept in a bit more.

When I got to church a two rows behind Kellie. She was sitting next to someone I didn't recognize. During the meet and greet I went down to him and he said he was Mark, Kellie's guest. During the service they looked pretty cozy. Got nobody to blame but myself. I had months to ask her out or even sit next to her.

I missed most of the sermon. All I could think about was that Mark guy hanging with Kellie. My heart sunk. I felt like I did when Brian told me my services were no longer required.

I know Grant was talking to me when he gave the sermon. He kept looking at me. My mom did too. That was scary. In church I should be learning about the Lord and heaven. Not Kellie and Mark rolling around naked. Oh what a sickening feeling!

After the service my mom invited me over for lunch. She said it would cheer me up. Did she know? I guess I looked pretty shitty -- what with the hang over and Kellie and all.

We went to Cathay Inn for lunch and I told my mom about the new job. She said I already told her. I didn't remember – duh.

She asked me if they were going to give me a phone to use. No. And I can't qualify for a cell phone of my own without a million dollar deposit with my credit. She told me I could go to an AT&T store tomorrow and pick out a cell phone and she would add me to her family plan. Having an AT&T phone myself might make it easier to sale them to others. I reminded her that I didn't sale phones, just customer service. She said, "whatever, at least we have an inside man".

That was the best news I heard all week! Even better than getting the job. Now I could tell Cricket to go to hell! No more bridge payments and no more 'temporary disconnects', I'm a real man now! Maybe I can get a cool ringtone now.

Tiger

July 20, 2008

Dear Diary,

Today was awesome! My teacher's name is Tia and she's a babe! No ring and she looks pretty young. But she's not for me. I don't think it's right for a student to date a teacher, even if she's hot! Also my sis told me it's bad karma to dip your pen in company ink. But hey, a guy can dream huh?

There are 19 people in our class. Tia said only about half will make it to graduation and the call floor. I think I'll be fine. I know cell phones and I like to learn.

The first day we made nametags and stood up and introduced ourselves. One of the single girls caught my eye. She's no Kellie. But she's a knock out! She is about my age and around 5'8". Way out of my league. Why isn't she a model?

I talked to her at break in the smoking area. Her name is Kimberly Trustone. Kellie didn't work out and if Tia doesn't work out, who knows?

I went to Riverpark Square after work and picked up a new Sony Erickson Walkman phone. I'm still learning about it. It will be nice to show up tomorrow with my very own AT&T phone. Many of the other students have one. Tia has one. Kimberly is pre-paid.

Tiger

July 21, 2008

Dear Diary,

My 2^nd day of training was uneventful. We learned the basics of the company and filled out more paperwork. This gave me a chance to learn a little more about Kimberly.

I don't know what it is about her but I like her. She is funny, smart, and she has the best laugh I have ever heard. She can make even the most boring things exciting. When Tia said we had Internet access but wasn't allowed to use it on the floor, Kimberly said, "Good. Nobody will be able to see my embarrassing pics on www.porn." I kinda wish it were true.

I learned Tia has a boyfriend and Kimberly doesn't. Guess I know where my free time will go. I did get her number. I couldn't remember my number. So I called her and she saved it. I took her picture for caller ID. She struck a pose.

I called her later and we talked about class and our life. She has two kids. I don't know. I really want a fresh start with my women. But she is so awesome I think I can work with it. At least they live with their dad and not Kimberly. That might work. But she does have an ex. So much more to learn.

Hurry up sun.

Tiger